Are You Relationship Material?

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Try as you might, none of your relationship worked out. So, is it really a case of 'it's not me, it's you'? As in YOU.

For some people, relationship is as clear as a bright sunny day. They know what they want and who they are going to spend the rest of their life with. But for others, it is not as easy as ABC. What happens when you've been on the dating scene for a while now but still can't make the crossover to commitment-ville?

Time to question yourself, that's what.

Ok, first thing first. The most important relationship that you'll ever have in your life is the one with yourself. When you are actually in touch with your mind, body and spirit, and set about to take care of yourself the best way possible, then will you be able to open up to others outside of yourself. If you can't treat yourself with love and honesty, you can't expect others to do the same.

Now let's get reflecting and be honest.

Are you good at sharing? 

No, we don't mean share your partner but rather share your life. You do know that when you're in a relationship, things will slowly get more intimate and you'll be sharing a lot more time, history and space together, right? So how willing are you to give in to these openly because you want to and not because you feel or think you need to or it's the right thing to do. It's all about the 'we' thinking rather than 'I'.

Are you good at listening?

This is a trait that is important no matter who you're with. Are you truly present when someone speaks? Can you fully engage in a conversation or do you find yourself daydreaming away, being more interested in checking your emails, phone and etc? Without good listening skills, your relationship will not be able to grow because when a person feels that he or she is not heard by you, they will most likely believe that you don't find them important. Also, it's a sign of disrespecting that person's time.

Are you willing to give up some privacy? 

We all have secrets but not to the extend of putting up walls and keeping our partners out. Being in a relationship means you lose some of your privacy and you're ok with that. It shouldn't be a big deal to be more transparent. But if you feel strongly negative about letting him into your world, you may want to reexamine yourself. Do you have something to hide? Or real trust issue that makes it very hard to be honest with your partner?

Are you troubled by your past?

This can stemmed from childhood fears, family upbringing, past relationships, etc. Like it or not, we are shaped by our attitudes, beliefs and behaviours from young and history has a way of creeping up on us. Take a hard look at your relationships with your family, friends and ex-lovers. Are you subconsciously holding back because of a particular bad episode? Is there any correlation between past issues with the current ones? You need to be honest with yourself and recognise what may be limiting your relationship potential.Are you the faithful type?

Women, like men, are prone to wander too. And nothing is more devastating than a third person. Sometimes, it may just means you're not ready to commit to one person. So ask yourself how prepared are you to be in a monogamous relationship? Can you play by the rules and not cause hurt? Lay it all out on the table and see where you stand. If you're not ready, that's ok, just don't drag another person who may not share your same views into the fling.

SUMBER